I carry a bunch of keys, it dangles from my backpack. too many keys. and I keep adding more. It’s all doors to houses that I will never call home

my pockets are full of bus and train tickets. my mind is overflowing with old pictures, with memories. there’s yours, too. couldn’t miss that one

please forgive me, I am not staying. I am chasing a dream, I wouldn’t know what to make of stability. habits, routines, you already know how much I can fuck that up

forgive me, it’s not like I’m giving up

it’s like when you can’t sleep, because you are too tired and your head is too full. when you start questioning if you were ever awake in the first place. when you realize that maybe, just maybe, you actually have something to lose

when it’s not the right time to cry, and you immediately push that tear back

maybe, you’ll hear of me someday. maybe, we’ll meet again, all grown up and everything

one day, I will be able to shrug off people’s trust. people’s hopes

one day, I’ll throw that bunch of keys to the waves

but yours. the key to your heart, that one I’ll keep safe

that tear will finally roll down, nothing stopping it. it’ll shatter on the airport’s tarmac, on the stairs to the train station. the wind will catch it, and it will mix with the pouring rain. that one day

as I will be leaving, and I’ll be handing you my winter. please, take care of it while I’m not here. I will give it to you in a carefully packed bag, so it’ll take as little space as possible. this way, it will be much easier to hide

I will hand it over to you in a rush, quickly

as I won’t come back